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Weddings, graduations, baby showers, and Father’s Day are all great occasions for gifting quilts! Quilters show our love and affection to family and friends through our passion. We put tons of time, thought and money into making a quilt gift. As we stitch it together, we think loving thoughts of the recipient. It’s sharing a small part of our soul, when we give a quilt.
I’ve heard from quite a few quilters in the last weeks about how upset they are about how their gift is being treated or how it is not being used as intended.
“I can’t believe they put in in a closet!”
“They keep it in their car!”
“It went on a picnic!”
“The dogs (cats, hamsters, lizards) lay on it!”
“They washed it in bleach (hot water, with their blue jeans)!”
The Solution
In my mind, there is only one way to remedy this situation. Tell them!
Do you want the baby quilt to get used and washed and spit up on and washed and loved and washed? Tell Them.
Is the quilt meant to be used on the couch for snuggling and movie watching and reading? Tell Them.
Did you intend the quilt to be used carefully on a guest bed or to be hung on the wall? Tell Them.
Quilts can also be heirlooms meant to be handed down through generations. No one will ever know, unless you Tell Them.
Often times the person who receives your quilt has no idea how much time, money and love went into making it. These are the people who call quilts (shudder) “blankets” and it’s up to you to educate them. They may not know the best way to care for a quilt. Include a card with instructions. The Quilting Company has put together a printable Quilt Care PDF that you can download and print. Here’s another one: (its got all of those hieroglyphics that no one knows what they mean, but will make you seem sophisticated).
On the other hand, they may know how dedicated you are and how much of your energy goes into the quilts you make and my not want to “spoil” the quilt by using it. Be sure to talk with the recipient and say something like, “Please use this quilt. I made it for baby to be loved and comforted. It is not an heirloom. Use it and wash it. Put it on the floor for baby to play. If it wears out, I can make another. ” Here’s a cute poem (sorry I do not know the author, it’s been used by me for many years):
Your Baby Quilt
This quilt is made of cloth and thread
To place upon your little bed.
It’s not an heirloom just to keep,
But to lay upon as you count sheep.
Or perhaps the floor’s the perfect place
For a doll and teddy picnic space.
This quilt can be anything you dream
From Superman’s cape to the robe of a Queen.
Pretend it’s a raft adrift at sea,
Or just cuddle up and watch TV.
So use it up and wear it out.
I promise I won’t yell or pout.
Just tell me when it’s days are through,
And I’ll make another, just for YOU.
When gifting quilts, Tell Them or you are not allowed to complain!
How do you convey this information? Does anyone know who wrote that poem? I would love to give credit. Tell us in the comments.
by Mary Beth Krapil, Handi Quilter National Educator
I learned very early on in my quilting history of 50+ years that once you gift ANYTHING it is NO longer yours. So, even if you tell the recipient the purpose of the quilt, do not be disappointed if that is not what it is used for. Bless them that listen. Do sign and date your quilts, just in case someone thinks enough your work to pass it on to the next generation. Happy quilting and Happy gifting!
When I give a gift it is with no strings attached. The recipient is welcome to call it a blanket, I will not get my knickers in a knot if it winds up in the dogs bed.
I would never give instructions on how I expect the gift to be used.
I would offer laundry tips, but they are not hard and fast rules.
I turned down the gift of a beautiful dining suite as it came with rules and strings attached. The person giving it used it only once in 20 years.
I agree Michelle, in my mind it’s a gift. They can do with it as they wish. I just like to let them know the best way to wash it if needed and also to let them know they need not be shy about using the quilt.
I love the poem. May I make two tiny grammatical corrections?
But to LIE upon as you count your sheep
Just tell me when ITS days are through
Thanks Irma, I agree with those corrections. I included it in its original form as the author had written it. I didn’t edit it.
I guess that I prefer that my gifted quilts get used, and I do advise the folks on how to wash it, but I am just happy to have the ability to create a personal loving gift to my dearest, or a person in need, and hope they use it and enjoy it and even wear it out! I agree with Mary Lubin, it is no longer mine, it is theirs ! I agree with Mary Beth, we need to be sure those washing instructions are included …Telling them !!!
It drives me bonkers when people complain about how their gifted quilt is treated. I completely agree that instructions should go with the quilt! I also will wash the finished quilt, sometimes twice, before gifting it so that I have peace of mind that they won’t have issues.
I always take into consideration the person who is receiving the quilt and how they are likely to use it, and adjust accordingly. My cousin who loves to drive up into the mountains at night and stargaze is going to receive a denim backed flannel quilt, not a paper pieced batik, 100-hours-to-quilt heirloom… My sister has 2 cats who are under 2 years old and love to snuggle with her, so she gets a quilt that *hopefully* will withstand kitty claws for a few years. Know your audience! I am also somewhat picky about who receives a quilt, as I do want them to be well loved.
I believe quilters should always ask the intended recipient if he/she even wants a quilt. Babies are an exception but we should always talk to a parent. Many people don’t want them. Just because we love quilts, doesn’t mean everyone does.
I agree, once it is gifted, they can do as they see fit. However, when visiting a recipient who received a hand pieced and hand quilted quilt from me, and I found it on their gravel mud driveway for the dogs to lay on?? Lots of tears and NEVER to receive a hand made item from me again.
I am greatly intrigued at how few people actually read and obey instructions these days. But I still live in hope that my quilt gifts will be used and enjoyed without too disastrous laundering, so I supply a very simple set of Care Clues. Only time will tell if anybody bothers to use them